Should we hide our happiness in this day and age?

I was watching "The Idea of You" on Amazon Prime yesterday because what's better than watching a new rom-com movie on your day off? Can I get an amen from all the hopeless romantics out there?

Anyway, I was watching the movie, a typical May-December love story, pretty predictable yet enjoyable. Aren't we reading and watching love stories for the same arc? Boy meets girl, everything is dreamy and fun and amazing. Boy messes up, everything goes to shit, something or someone saves the day, boy gets the girl back. You can change the boy and girl around in this scenario, but it's pretty much the same, and we are there for the happy ending because if we don't get to see the happy endings at least in movies, why even bother?

But this is not why I am writing this. In the midst of all that, what stood out for me was how in this particular relationship and in almost all relationships out there, something goes to shit as soon as other people find out you have found happiness. For famous people and celebrities, it's even worse. It's like there is an army of angry and bitter people just sitting around waiting to bring down two people who have found love and happiness, albeit temporary. What does the length of the relationship have to do with happiness anyway? You can experience being in love with someone for a fortnight - Hi Taylor Swift - and the love can stay with you forever.

How did this happen? When did seeing other people happy become such a burden for some? And the most painful of all, what do you do when the closest people in your life become the paparazzi? What do you do when the ones who were supposed to be in your corner start acting out as internet trolls camouflaged as concern? How do you cope with that?

This will hurt so much more because with the internet you can at least tell yourself these people don't know me and they are just acting little and sad and pathetic, but what if the sad little pathetic people know you? Or you think they should.

What do you do when the people who are supposed to be loving and caring about you are the ones who want to see you miserable? Where have you gone wrong? Who did you surround yourself with all that time? And most importantly, why did you put up with it for so long?

These are the questions I had to ask a couple of times in my life, and it broke my heart every time. And it applies not only to love stories of your life but basically to any kind of happiness. It got to a point that I felt I have to hide, and it became harder and harder to share my joy and happiness.

Is social media the true villain in this story? Yes and no. Social media didn't create schadenfreude, but it gave the people living off of it a mega microphone.

The first time I experienced that people can get bitter and angry and vindictive because you have found love and they haven't was when I was 20 years old, and the only social media was Orkut. Yes, I know. I am ancient. Not the point though. The point is people have always been like this, but they never had the collective power of finding each other and thriving on bringing others down. We have to admit we have lost the battle to them; we're outnumbered because they have been multiplied hiding behind fake accounts and bots and whatnot. I threw my hat in around 3 months ago when I vowed I am leaving social media for good this time, after many many years. It's been a ride, and it's too soon to say how I feel about it, but whenever I think about all the hatred and meanness and judgment just floating around on every platform, I feel I don't want to come out of this cocoon.

I am a firm believer in the power of stories and how sharing them is what makes life bearable. But I have to say it's becoming harder and harder every day to do so. There are people out there with machetes ready to tear you apart just because they didn't 'like' the way you are saying something, and faceless, nameless megaphones have opinions about absolutely everything.

Going back to personal trolls, what I was trying to say was this new climate gave validation to what we were experiencing before, and now people wear their ill-wills on their sleeves with pride. That is what messed up about all this. But do we lose hope? Do we throw our hats in and retreat? Yes and no. Yes, in the sense that we don't feel obligated to share every milestone, every happy memory with everyone. Let's keep that to our inner circle of people who have been with us through thick and thin. The ones we know will jump up and down in joy and the ones who have held our hands through loss and heartbreak. And no because we can't let the assholes win. We can take their ammunition away from them and leave them pathetic and empty-handed shouting into the void. I guess what I am trying to say is that protect your stories, protect your happy moments. They're precious and they're yours. Choose wisely who you share them with and how.